Be Still

In the dark I sat unmoving
Blinded more from pain than lack of light
I cry out to You God
For reassurance, for guidance
As the realization of what place I'm in
Begins to dawn
I am lost, my navigation pointless
Hope in me, You say
I pause...I know I am desperate
I know there's no other way through or around
I say, ok.
Dread makes a lunge, I try to move out of the way
Stumbling to the window I pull back the curtain
Searching desperately and longing for the tiniest bit of You
Trees bend and sway with impending storm
Clouds dampen what might have been early morning light
What might have been hope in my heart
But I trust You God
Or rather, I'm trying despite-
Slumped, back in my chair
Praying in broken fragments for peace
The air disturbed by cries of a child wanting mama
I'm so weary Lord
I don't have it in me to comfort my girl
Down the stairs I hear her steps
My arms surround her anyway
Another sleepyhead wanders down, another gift from God
Another babe who wakes with the sense
That I am not near
That there's disturbance in our walls
Bundled and surrendered, we three lay quietly under the large blanket on the couch
Deep sigh, I feel a little hand in mine
And then another, even smaller hand wriggles in too
Oh Lord, thank You that right now I'm not alone
I allow my eyes to close in brief respite
Aware of pain still present from tears that burn
I lift my head, exhale an unexpected breath of peace
My worn out eyes adjust
A faint shift has begun in the contrast of shapes and shadows around us
You're here
Despite what obscures our view
If we throw open the curtains, even in the night
Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain
We will see your goodness
You faithful will remain
Be still my soul

Awaken

Shut

Tight
Eye lids crunch
Hurt arms clutch
Shame

Shapes

Move
Beneath the lids
Beyond in shadows
Dim

Bump

Crash

They hurt and yet
They stumble blinded
Too

Cry 

Out
Try to squint
Eyes yell quit
Death

Light 

Streams 
Redemptive work

This seeing hurts

Grace

Abrasive
Blinding

Glaring

Jarring

More
Pain 

Tempers raise 

While light reclaims

Dark

Re-
Focus. 

Colors
Flood
Sharpened pain
And joy; Sustained
Love

Brave
Lens
Meets the gaze
Of the todays
Hope

Light
Spills 
And light reflects

Light reflects
Life 

Awake